A Journey from Mistrust to Love: How My God's best found me

Mr. & Mrs. Calva

    Once upon a time, in the early days of my career, I worked as an office assistant at the Civil Aviation Authority of the Philippines (CAAP). Little did I know that this ordinary job would lead me on a life-changing journey, introducing me to the man who would become not just my partner but the love of my life.

   Back then, I was focused on work, not thinking about love or companionship. I had some biases against men and was content with my single life. Fate had other plans, though, and it involved a person who challenged my preconceptions and showed me the true meaning of love.

    This person was a colleague at CAAP, my future husband. At first, I misunderstood him, thinking he might be gay due to his mannerisms. As I got to know him, I realized I was wrong. He was interested in women, surprising me. He pursued me, showing his interest clearly. But I wasn't ready for a relationship, and I kept turning him down, convinced his intentions weren't genuine.

    Despite my rejections, he persisted for six long months. His determination began to wear down my defenses. I turned to prayer for guidance and felt a strong inclination to help him strengthen his relationship with God. I invited him to my church, and to my amazement, this sparked a transformation in him.

    He embraced faith, got baptized, and started courting me sincerely. Something clicked, and he became the person I had hoped to meet. I learned a profound lesson – it wasn't my role to change him, but God's work in his heart that mattered.

Our bundle of joy.

    Over time, he chipped away at my skeptical heart with patience, faith, and a commitment to change for the better. Despite challenges with my family due to my earlier negative comments about him, he embraced the Filipino tradition of courting a family for their daughter's hand. With determination and faith, he won over my family.

    Life brought uncertainties, as he left his job for a more stable position. I worried it might end our courtship, but after seeking guidance from God, I felt he was the one. On April 1, 2017, a day associated with jokes, I surprised him by saying yes to his proposal.

    From that point on, our journey was a rollercoaster of ups and downs. On December 20, 2020, surrounded by love and blessings, we made the life-changing decision to get married. Our love story took another turn when our daughter entered the world on August 25, 2022, filling our lives with more joy.

    Reflecting on this incredible journey, my heart overflows with gratitude. I've learned the true meaning of acceptance, the power of love, and the importance of understanding. This story shows that love often arrives unexpectedly and has the power to change us remarkably.

    Through all the twists and turns, one thing remains clear – the guiding hand of God orchestrated this beautiful story, teaching me the value of faithfulness and showering me with boundless love and grace. My journey from a skeptical heart to a heart full of love is a testament to the fact that love knows no boundaries and is a force more powerful than we can imagine.

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Navigating Life with PCOS: A Journey of Discovery, Challenges, and Strength

Life is a journey filled with twists and turns, unexpected discoveries, and moments that define our strength. One such discovery for me was Polycystic Ovary Syndrome (PCOS), a condition that brought challenges and lessons I never anticipated. It was during my first trimester of pregnancy that I stumbled upon this hidden aspect of my health. Little did I know that this revelation would tie together the struggles of my younger years, my pregnancy, and my role as a working mom into a story of resilience, acceptance, and hope.

Unraveling the Mystery: Discovering PCOS

It was during the routine first-trimester ultrasound that I learned about my PCOS. The experience was a blend of surprise, confusion, and a sense of finally connecting the dots. Looking back, I realized that the signs were always there, subtly impacting my life even before I knew what PCOS was.

The Early Struggles: Weight, Cycles, and Identity

Throughout my younger years, I battled with weight fluctuations and irregular menstrual cycles. Little did I understand that these were signals from my body, urging me to pay attention. The weight struggles took a toll on my self-esteem, and the unpredictable cycles left me feeling lost and out of control. These experiences shaped my perception of myself, and they would later become intertwined with my PCOS journey.

The Pregnancy Twist: PCOS and Motherhood

Pregnancy was meant to be a time of joy and anticipation, but for me, it brought new challenges. My PCOS exacerbated during pregnancy, causing discomfort and worry. My body's reaction was a reminder that PCOS wasn't something I could simply put on hold—it was a part of me, impacting not only me but also the life growing within me.

Birth and Beyond: Embracing Reality

The birth of my child was a beautiful yet transformative experience. However, it also highlighted the negative effects PCOS had on my body. Recovery wasn't easy, and the demands of being a new mom added to the complexity. Balancing the needs of my child, my work responsibilities, and my own health became an intricate dance—one that often left me drained and overwhelmed.

The Power of Acceptance: Embracing Myself

One of the most challenging aspects of the journey was the realization that not everyone understood what I was going through. Explaining the fatigue, the hormonal imbalances, and the emotional ups and downs was an uphill battle. But with time, I learned that acceptance didn't require validation from others. It was about acknowledging my struggles, embracing my uniqueness, and seeking support from those who truly cared.

 Seeking Balance Amidst Chaos: The Road to Well-being

As a working mom with PCOS, high blood pressure, and vertigo, my plate was undeniably full. The desire to adopt a healthier lifestyle was present, but the execution seemed daunting. The exhaustion from work and the fear of deprivation held me back. It was at this point that I turned to prayer for strength—a plea for the willpower to care for my body and witness the milestones of my child's life.

 A Resolution of Strength and Hope

In the face of these challenges, I found a renewed determination. PCOS, high blood pressure, and vertigo were part of my journey, but they didn't define me. I learned to listen to my body, to rest when needed, and to take small steps towards a healthier lifestyle. It wasn't about drastic diets or strict regimens; it was about nurturing my body with kindness and patience.

 As I continue this journey, I've come to appreciate the beauty of resilience. Each day presents an opportunity to make better choices, to cherish the moments with my child, and to strengthen the bond with my body. PCOS taught me that life's challenges can be transformed into platforms for growth and empowerment. It taught me to trust in my inner strength, seek support from my loved ones, and believe in the power of prayer.

In sharing my story, I hope to inspire others facing similar challenges. Life might throw curveballs, but our response determines our journey's course. We are not alone in our struggles, and each step we take towards self-care and self-acceptance is a step towards a brighter, healthier future. Remember, you are stronger than your challenges, and every day is a chance to rewrite your story with hope, courage, and unwavering faith.

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Life's Wild Ride: From Unexpected Marriages to Toddler Adventures

Dedication Day of baby Psalmnelle.

Hey there, dear readers! It's been a whirlwind since my last blog update, and boy, do I have some juicy tales to spill! You won't believe the rollercoaster that life has taken me on. So grab your popcorn and let's dive in!

First off, can you believe it? I took the plunge and got married on December 20, 2020. Yep, that's right, yours truly walked down the aisle, and let me tell you, it wasn't to the man I had on my "dream husband" checklist. Nope, no siree! But you know what they say, "Man plans, and God laughs." Turns out, the Big Guy had a way better plan in mind for me, and lo and behold, I ended up with Mr. Not-So-Perfect on Paper. And guess what? It's been a wild ride, and I wouldn't change a thing!

Fast forward to the present—guess who's a mom now? Yep, me! At the ripe old age of 33 (or should I say "ripe young age"?), I welcomed my little bundle of joy into the world. Drumroll, please... my tiny human just celebrated her first birthday on August 25, 2023! Can you believe it? It's like she was born yesterday, and now she's basically a toddler genius. I mean, she's got brains, beauty, and oh boy, does she have an attitude! And guess where she gets that from? Yep, you guessed it—her dear old mama!

Now, let's talk about the juggling act that's become my life. Picture this: I'm navigating the treacherous waters of both work and motherhood. I'm basically a superhero, just without the cape (because let's be real, who has time for capes?). And thank the stars for my mom, who swoops in to save the day like a real-life superheroine. She's the reason I can attempt to adult during the day without having a full-on panic attack. Kudos to you, Mom!

Life's a funny old thing, isn't it? It's a crazy mix of ups, downs, twists, and turns. But you know what? Through all the chaos, I'm beyond grateful to the Big Guy upstairs for never giving up on me. I may be stubborn as a mule, but He's stuck with me through thick and thin. So, here's to counting blessings and embracing the unexpected, like my little bundle of joy named Psalmnelle. Yep, that's her name, and let me tell you, I'm head over heels, totally, completely, and utterly in love.

Until next time, keep riding those life rollercoasters with your hands in the air and a heart full of gratitude! Cheers to the chaos, my friends! 🎢🎉

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Jesus is Coming Soon (Blog Update 2020)

It's been so long since I started writing again on my blogspot. I had been so occupied with so many things in life that I forgot to appreciate God's gift to me which is being able to wake up everyday with a smile on my face and being able to eat three times a day. 

Ever since this COVID-19 Pandemic began, the world is seemingly coming to an end. Just like what was written in the book of Revelations, John's testimony about the end of days is surely revealing. The people have become selfish, arrogant and heartles...and I too am becoming one. 

"Jesus is coming soon. Jesus is indeed coming soon!" 

My PRAYER: 

Lord Jesus Christ, I know you are coming soon. Please don't leave me alone. Forgive me for being too arrogant, selfish and heartless. I don't deserve your grace and mercy yet here you are, still here, watching and waiting for me. 

I'm sorry Lord for taking you for granted, I'm sorry Lord for the bad things I did and I'm sorry Lord for disappointing you so many times. 

Take me to your Kingdom Lord. Take me and the people I love and care about. Don't leave me alone in my sinfulness. Redeem and renew me Oh Jesus Christ! I beg you. Heal me oh Lord. 

I am your child Lord, your little princess. Nothing can change that. I belong only to you.  

I worship you.  You are Waymaker, miracle worker and light of the darkness. I worship you. 

That is who you are and I will worship you.

Even if I don't see or feel you are working, you never stop, you never stop working. 

Thank you Jesus! 

AMEN. 

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Your Choice, My Future: Selecting Responsible Leaders for a Better Nation

           Philippines is a great nation and I believe that it is so. I may be young but I value and respect the strengths and weaknesses of my beloved country. The Filipino heroes who sacrificed their blood and guts to protect this nation are our core and sanctuary. Our history makes us who we are and our differences will keep us united.

            To our distinguished panel of judges, esteemed teachers, beloved parents, fellow students, ladies and gentlemen, good morning!

            “The price of greatness is responsibility,” said Winston Churchill. But what does he mean by this? Could it be that we, as citizens of this country, are responsible to the positive and negative outcome that may occur in the future or do the choices we make determine the responsibility that we ought to partake for our future?

            Some say that to become responsible, one must learn to realize something important for responsibility is the ability to decide and act well for a better reason, since it is when responsible decisions result to wise actions.  Nonetheless, how does being responsible and making good choices effect to good governance? The answer to that is good leadership.

            Good leadership is not a question of who, what, where and why? For good leadership does not necessarily require a person must possess an excellent background to become a better leader, because one of the best qualities of a great leader is the ability to be unselfish.

            Peter Drucker once said and I quote: The leaders who work most effectively, it seems to me, never say “I”. And that’s not because they have trained themselves not to say “I”. They don’t think “I”. They think “We”, they think “Team”. They understand their job to make the team function. They accept responsibility and don’t sidestep it, but “we” gets the credit…This is what creates trust, what enables you to get the task done!

            Thereby, a great leader sets aside his interests for others because a great leader is not measured by his affluence and arrogance but by the strength of his heart.

            However, responsibility does not end there. Our leaders are not the only people who can change and decide for our future. We, as citizens, are also responsible. We have the right to choose and elect for a responsible leader. Someone who is passionate, willing to sacrifice, inspires and influences others, strong, but not boorish; kind, but not weak; brave, but not an oppressor; considerate, but not lazy; humble, but not apprehensive; proud, but not conceited; humorous, but without folly.

            Call it as it may, but the truth of the matter is—we hold the power to a successful and glorious future! Thus, it’s not enough that we settle for something disdainful because someone has blinded us to be frail. We must not let ourselves be deceived or empowered by anyone. Now is not the time to be vain and egotistic for we are committed, we are responsible for the betterment of our nation.

            I maybe youthful; have less experienced and naïve, but I am aware of our nation’s predicament. Yet I am determined, determined to influence each of you to start being responsible for your actions. Likewise, I want to be conscientious. I want to be able to decide responsibly and wisely for my actions. I dream of a great nation, a nation without malice and voracity. Thereby, the choices that you will make will determine my future, our future.  

            Beloved Citizens, our right to choose must not be painted with gluttony and self-centeredness. Our country needs us. It needs us to be strong, determined, committed and responsible. Let our actions inspire others to do more, become more, learn more and motivate more because it has always been our choice, our choice for a better life, our choice for a better future and our choice for a better nation.

All rights reserved © Shiya Tamasao 2019

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